Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Try to love the questions themselves

Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart
and try to love the questions themselves ...
We often don’t like questions. Questions don’t normally give us points on exams. It’s almost always the answers that seem to be more important, but answers without good questions are worthless… I often hate writing blogs now because I feel like I have to share answers… and I don’t have them!!! However, I’m beginning to realize that maybe the questions are just as or more important. Rather that diligently searching for answers that can’t be found in one simple sentence I will push my self to start struggling and wrestling with las preguntas. Well formed or not, here come some of my many questions:
  • What are the systems in place in our world that oppress and how can we work to break them down?
  • How do we play a role in consumerism that negatively affects the lives of so many?
  • How can I help people at home see that the lack of clean water and adequate sanitation is a important issue affecting so many in the world?
  • How can I continue to learn to be at peace with and live with the questions?
  • In what ways can my experiences with hospitality, welcome and love be shared with people back home?
  • What does fighting for social justice look like?
  • What kind of immigration reform will start reuniting families and start eliminating the horrible divides that exist in our US society?
  • How can I use my strengths to be more welcoming and friendly?
  • What biases do I hold without even knowing it?
  • What does it look like to practice solidarity & mutuality with one’s neighbors?
  • How will this year change the way I look at and understand the world?
  • Where will I be next year?
We recently had a retreat with all the volunteers here in Mexico in which we discussed the affects of globalization and let me tell you... that is enough to sending one’s mind spinning… In a moment of my perpetual guilt about everything and anything (if you know me well you’ll understand) I encountered a phrase, a friend and a poem that I would like to share. First was a phrase that we talked about in Orientation: “Sit with the discomfort.” I thought ok I’ll try… Meanwhile I was venting to a friend from back home about not feeling like I was working on learning enough or not searching for answers enough or not “being” enough when she reminded me: “… with time you'll see that you learned more than you know you learned. That's the magic of REAL learning, it's not conscious.” And as a struggle, I remember the poem by Rainer Maria Rilke…

Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart
and try to love the questions themselves ...
Don't search for the answers,
which could not be given to you now,
because you would not be able to live them.
And the point is, to live everything.
Live the questions now.
Perhaps then, someday far in the future,
you will gradually, without even noticing it,
live your way into the answer.

Author of Life, I pray for the current YAGMs and all who are struggling with questions and searching for answers. I pray that we learn to live with the discomfort and without even knowing it you will teach us more than we realize we are learning at the moment. May we live the questions now and gradually live our way into the answers. In Jesus Name we pray, AMEN.